Your damage is not my damage, but your damage is OK

"Because... reasons."

Over the course of your life,
have you met at least one true asshole?

No, not somebody with a different opinion, who is otherwise acceptable.  I'm talking about full, Category-5 douchebaggery.

My dad would call these jokers, "clinical assholes."

Dad worked as a psychologist since before I was born, retiring from a job with the State of New York's Department of  Mental Health.   He specialized in the dual-diagnoses of mental illness with retardation.  As a state employee, it wasn't surprising that New York's "worst of the worst" were also his clients: the criminals, the violent cases.

One beautiful and uniqe snowflake went so above and beyond that Dad felt the usual diagnoses just didn't explain it well enough.  He wrote the diagnosis as: "Asshole." 

The higher-ups took issue with that."Asshole" was not a diagnosis anywhere in the DSM-III (the manual that mental health, in the 1980's, used to diagnose people.)  It was not included in the revisions, either. (...although I think it should have been.)
Dad was told it was not appropriate to diagnose a patient as a "Clinical Asshole."
"Spend 15 minutes in a room with the guy," Dad offered. "You'll see exactly what I mean."
The lead psychiatrist took his challenge, and, after 15 minutes, walked out of the room.  Dad's diagnosis stood.
Yes, friends, this means that, somewhere, in the dark, dusty record-keeping of NYS, there is one recorded case of a patient with the disorder: Asshole.

If you're laughing at this story, it's probably because you've met your share of  Clinical Assholes.*
I know I have.
There's a deeper truth to bring away from this:  Clinical Assholes happen, but they're also rare.
Yet, I am probably not alone in feeling terrified of sounding like that asshole, of being that asshole.
I over-analyze the hell out of everything I do.
Re-read, edit, revise, "sleep on it," re-visit it to make sure it still sonds good the next morning...
I claw myself up with self-criticism.

Your inner critic works overtime to make sure your conscious mind is hyper-aware of everything that could go wrong.  Please remember this.  This is my gift to you: the chances are better than good that you're not a Clinical Asshole.

Usually, when I have been criticized, the real meat of the criticism comes down to, "I have is a different viewpoint than you do."   The most often, what I see is, "Your opinion differs from mine." but, sometimes, it's closer to "You have your own damage, and your damage is not my damage."
If there's one gift the writers of the internet have given us, it's the chance at a much wider perspective. There are so many voices, all coing from different backgrounds, each with very different point of view. Often, their point of view feels like the Grand Canyon. meaning I can see the other side but I just can't get there from here.  Even at that, we're still not into Clinical Asshole territory.

A quick test:  If  you're worried about being the asshole in the room, it's a good sign that you're not being the asshole in the room.  In my experience, the people who are the most concerned with being percieved as assholes are the least likely to be the assholes. (Clinical assholes, by definition, do not care about this... it's one of their defning features.) Concen over how others react to us and our actions is the guard-rail that keeps us from falling into that canyon and being killed during the fall.

Trust yourself, come closer and share the view.
You're doing fine.

*If you've been deeply offended by this story, it's probably time to step away from the internet for today.

A Kite is a Victim

A kite is a victim you are sure of.
You love it because it pulls
gentle enough to call you master,
strong enough to call you fool;
because it lives
like a desperate trained falcon
in the high sweet air,
and you can always haul it down
to tame it in your drawer.

A kite is a fish you have already caught
in a pool where no fish come,
so you play him carefully and long,
and hope he won't give up,
or the wind die down.

A kite is the last poem you've written
so you give it to the wind,
but you don't let it go
until someone finds you
something else to do.

A kite is a contract of glory
that must be made with the sun,
so you make friends with the field
the river and the wind,
then you pray the whole cold night before,
under the travelling cordless moon,
to make you worthy and lyric and pure.


― Leonard Cohen, The Spice Box of Earth

They can keep their cliché and coincidence...

“Those around you can have their novellas, sweet, their short stories of cliché and coincidence, occasionally spiced up with tricks of the quirky, the achingly mundane, the grotesque. A few will even cook up Greek tragedy, those born into misery, destined to die in misery. But you, my bride of quietness, you will craft nothing less than epic with your life. Out of all of them, your story will be the one to last.” 
― Marisha Pessl, Special Topics in Calamity Physics

"If you're afraid to fall, you'll fall because you're afraid." -Daniel Ilabaca

Stop, Drop, and Roll

Getting stuck in a negative thought spiral feels like the worst thing on earth.
The day that I figured it was possible to break one of these spirals (if I could see it happening) I knew I'd gained a new and powerful tool. This is not a lofty claim that I'm a perfect, enlightened being, capable of mindfulness at all times. Some days, the demons win. Other days, I'd swear to you that they win far more often than I do, and I really suck at this... but, hopefully, I would stop myself and find a way to interrupt that thought pattern, right there.  Full stop.

Writing for the Elephant Journal, Michelle Margaret shares this piece of wisdom:
When I was in elementary school and they taught us about fire safety, the rule if your clothes caught on fire was to “stop, drop and roll.” For some reason, that slogan came into my mind recently, and I realized that it’s applicable to daily life practice, too.

When you get caught in a pattern of negativity—ill will, jealousy, anger, fear, self-hate or whatever it may be—stop.

Stop. Notice that you’ve been swept away from the present moment.

Drop. Let it go. Just as simple as that. Surrender. You don’t need to hold onto it anymore.

Roll. Life goes on. Continue on your way until you need to stop, drop and roll again.


Michelle offers us nine more great suggestions for re-aligning your spirit in her article, "How to be Free: 10 Simple, Transformative, Daily Life Practices." None of them require a lifetime of study or an advanced knowledge of Eastern Mysticism.  They're suggestions and ideas, each with the potential to become daily practice, should you find they help you.  

Firearms: Yes, it's a women's issue (I have opinions.)

Above: Lyudmila Mykhailivna Pavlichenko (July 12, 1916 – October 10, 1974), 

a Soviet sniper during WWII. She is credited with 309 kills, 

and regarded as the most successful female sniper in history. 

(Photo courtesy of wikimedia commons.)

Russian Female Snipers in WWII
were feared by 

combat trained German troops. 

(So much for guns being a macho-man only sport!) 

In fact, there were approximately 2,000 female snipers in the Red Army, of whom about 500 survived the war. Lyudmila Pavlichenko (pictured above), Nina Lobkovskaya, and Klavdiya Kalugina (who was only 17 at the start of her military service in 1943) were among the thousands of women who put themselves in the line of fire for Mother Russia.  They were armed with slightly more accurate but less-rugged sniper rifles (German: Scharfschützengewehr or SSG), than their conscripted brothers: an upgrade from the cheaper assault rifle.

While I have openly said that we, as a culture, really ought to consider just how "universal" that "right" to own a firearm really is (Hey, we do have a licencing process to drive cars, showing that we're not going to act like a damned fool when behind the wheel, correct? Most NRA members that I've talked to understand gun safety and the rules of firearms so well that they could teach a gun safety course themselves, and agree this is reasonable.) ...guns are also a women's right's issue, in that they truly become the great equalizer.  I am not a small woman (or a woman who should ever own a firearm) but I understand the fear that my petite friends feel when at risk of being beaten, abused, or raped.  Cornered and out-massed by 200 lbs. of angry pot-roast is no place to be.

...but one bullet is one bullet.  Nothing says "I'm not getting raped (mugged/ beaten) today!" like a large-caliber round to the center chest.  Simple, eloquent, and to-the-point.  The vast majority of rape cases will never go to trial, the majority of those that do will never be convicted, and, if you grew up in the United States, you probably know the rest. Dead men can't become repeat offenders.  If she is fighting for her life, no further argument is necessary.

19 Acts of Kindness, plus one.

Image by Google Images

Yesterday, I had the joy of sharing a great find called "the Best Drug of All," by Craig Arthur James.  This gem is a beautiful reminder of the subtle power to be found within arms reach, every day, through the simplest acts of kindness.  I love this stuff.

Let me put it in perspective:  it's so cold outside that the air feels like a thousand tiny knives stabbing into your flesh, and you know the only way to make them stop is to get someplace warm.  The commute to work can be deadly if you haven't practiced the skill of driving on slick roads.  The dark feels endless, and spring is only a promise held in the heart.  Depression kills. So, yes, I love this stuff, not only because I'm a sap and a romantic, but also because it gives me hope and a little extra faith in humanity.  "It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt (att.)  

Maybe an angel knew that I needed just a little extra encouragement today, and so these 19 more ways to light that candle found their way to me.  So much joy and love!  Does the cold and dark of mid-winter bring you down, too?  Maybe you'll find a way to smile (and send ripples of happiness out to others around you!) with these 19 Peculiar Acts of Kindness by Tanya Lee Markul.  For a nice, even 20, please, for me, encourage others to do the same, and keep it going.

Remember the umbrella story from the Best Drug of All, and understand that compersion (ie: joy because of another person's joy, or sorrow over another's sorrow) is part of what ties us together as a human tribe. Why keep this precious gift to yourself?  It's not limited, it will neither wear out nor deplete with repeated use. In order to light a candle for another, one was lit for us first. Each lights the next. When enough glow together, the collective power can light and warm an entire church. I've seen it, felt it, and it's still magical to me.

It's as magical as human compassion... or two umbrellas, in the right hands, on a rainy day.  Now it's your turn. Keep it going!  

The Best Drug of All

Artwork by Ralph Solonitz

Give a man with a warm soul, like Craig Arthur James, two umbrellas, and the miraculous will happen. His short story, "The Best Drug of All," published at Screwball Universe City, reminds me of the goodness to be found in the simplest deeds, often within arms reach. Being a superhero or a miracle worker so rarely requires powers beyond those of mortal men. Sometimes, it's something as simple as an umbrella on a rainy day.

The Wisdom of St. Therese

My kind-hearted neighbor, bottle-feeding rescued kittens in the Spring of 2013.

"There is no artist who does not like his work praised, and the Divine Artist of souls is pleased when we do not stop at the exterior, but penetrating even to the inmost sanctuary which He has chosen for His dwelling, we admire its beauty."~St. Therese de Liseux, ie: Theresa, "of the Little Way," Story of A Soul, Chapter I

Great video: God's Gonna Cut You Down (The Boondock Saints)

"What's done in the dark will be brought to the light..." ~Johnny Cash

"And Shepherds we shall be, for Thee, my Lord, for Thee."

"Do not kill, do not rape, do not steal. These are principles which every man of every faith can embrace." ~Boondock Saints

Love for John Donne's "Broken Heart"

Poet and satirist John Donne, a contemporary of William Shakespeare and Queen Elizabeth I, is a long-time personal favorite. I feel his work has an intensity that remains unmatched to this day. This piece sings to me. 

The Broken Heart 

 He is stark mad, who ever says,

That he hath been in love an hour,

Yet not that love so soon decays,

But that it can ten in less space devour;

Who will believe me, if I swear

That I have had the plague a year?

Who would not laugh at me, if I should say,

I saw a flask of powder burn a day?

St. Luke, Portia. "Melancholia."
Ink on paper with digital color.

Ah, what a trifle is a heart,

If once into love's hands it come!

All other griefs allow a part

To other griefs, and ask themselves but some;

They come to us, but us Love draws,

He swallows us, and never chaws:

By him, as by chain'd shot, whole ranks to die,

He is the tyrant pike, our hearts the fry.

If 'twere not so, what did become

Of my heart, when I first saw thee?

I brought a heart into the room,

But from the room, I carried none with me:

If it had gone to thee, I know Mine would have taught thine heart to show

More pity unto me: but Love, alas,

At one first blow did shiver it as glass

Yet nothing can to nothing fall,

Nor any place be empty quite,

Therefore I think my breast hath all

Those pieces still, though they be not unite;

And now as broken glasses show

A hundred lesser faces, so

My rags of heart can like, wish, and adore

But after one such love, can love no more.

~ John Donne (1572 – 1631)

Counsel for the Sincere Seeker

St. Luke, Portia. "Nude Ball." Graphite on paper. 1998. 

by Hongaku Zeshin
Daihonzan Suiren-Ji *

Hear, grown woman, the child in your eyes
just put the skipping rope down.
Hear, grown man, you put this serious mask just yesterday on.
With respect for the inspiration of the ancestors,
I say this only once,

for we should never meet each other like this again.

This is a dream! An illusion.
The self you assume you are is a dream image.
A clear distinct personality.
Just as the movie star projected in shimmering light on the silver screen, you, too, are a projection.
The light of a star exploded long ago in time of yore, the movie star long gone.
Walk out of the cave of Plato, leave the movie theater.
I know !!… It is a captivating movie, one you do not let go.
But the captivity that binds you is as illusionary as the movie.
Lose yourself in the movie,
become one with it and discover that your illusion consists of pure suffering.
Just as a table is made of wood, your dream is made of suffering.
O, sincere seeker, through the whole world you find monks, nuns, beggars, and hermits
who jingle bells, beat drums and gongs, blow horns, and cry out to wake us up.
To warn us that our illusion consists of pure greed, of burning passion for suffering.
Forget, forget your illusion, turn around, turn back to the place woven for the time.
Wake up, break the endless confusion that men teach each other.
Eternity is now, and now is eternity.
Hereafter does not exist.
There is only the eternal and forever lasting moment of now.
An egoless now, no I to attach to it.
Who, what, where you are or should you be.
What would you do with a self?

Ah, to give a name, confirm, affirm, captivate, and try to affix the illusion.

~And that is an illusion indeed!~

Zen has become a comfort, in the way that the rhythmic praying of the rosary was before.  Allowing time for daily meditation has allowed my mind the time to find stillness, without judgement or criticism.  Zen never denies God's grace, and never ridicules me for feeling "the deep magic" (~ C.S. Lewis) as an undeniable force in my life. All it asks is for me to release that, if only for now, and allow it to rest. In this, the deep magic can live alongside a deep peace.  I don't need to be the ideal of enlightened perfection... Like raku pottery or lovingly mended kintsugi ceramics, the irregularities that critics condemn as flaws are cherished because of the unique beauty they add and the story they tell.

Irony or paradox, but while Zen allow joyful acceptance of my own truth, it prevents hanging too much identity on it.  Whether I see myself as that intentionally imperfect raku pot, warped before I was ever fired, or the ["sweetly broken"][http://youtu.be/O5_Z3ZZYLDc] kintisugi, Zen reminds me perception is limited and distorted to the point that it might as well be complete illusion.  There may be no "imperfection," at all... or each of us might be a hot mess. What matters is that it does not matter."Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they're yours." - Richard Bach
"Convictions create convicts." ~ R.A. Wilson
Meditation is a daily practice, minutes to learn and a lifetime to perfect, but I am enjoying the journey.  

* Daihonzan = Head Temple (of) Suiren-Ji = the Soto Zen school where this was written.

Kittens, and their use in Repelling the Devil

A kitten is licking my face.


My eyes aren't open yet, but I know it's morning. I also know it's going to be a bad brain day. Hold perfectly still, don't move, don't twitch, wake up slowly, take stock of every sensation. My mind is screaming, but, apart from a snoring husband, the giant cat sleeping between us, and the tiny face-licker, nobody else is here... nothing threatening, anyway...  It's safe to move. Move slowly.

I stretch. Giant sleeping cat stretches, too, and snuggles further into me. Does he know it's a bad brain day? Can he feel, maybe smell, the chemicals that nature already released inside my skull? Is that why he's here? Not important right now. Open your eyes, dammit. Breathe deeply. You're stronger than your biochemistry. Ask yourself, “What do I have to do today?”


Not fail. Not completely fail. At Life.

The devil pulls the chair out from my drawing table and sits down. He looks pretty comfortable.

“Just here to help,” he says “You're planning out your day, and that's being productive, healthy and functional. My friend, you're trying to take control of that brain before it takes a hold of you. So, what would you say 'not fail' includes?”


Rectify all of my past wrongs, accomplish everything today that I need to accomplish, and anticipate everything that could go wrong in the future so that nothing ever will. Today. By the end of today. Yes, that's what the world would expect.


The Devil slowly lights a cigarette. “What if you fail at this, too?”


My brain shudders like it's been hit by a blast~wave, and I close my eyes. Of course I'll fail at this... but my mind is on fire, and there is no sense of reason. All I know is that I have to fix everything in the world, today, right now, and, dammit, it's just not possible.


I never want to open my eyes again.


I keep my eyes closed, but it's too late. The other fuzzballs have seen movement. They know they can play with me, and, with feline-single-mindedness, attack my face in licking and purring. Do they know it's a bad brain day? Could they tell before I opened my eyes, like I could?


They're still licking my face. I can't concentrate on anything else. This is perfect, since the Devil hates to be ignored. (Pride...) Focus on the kittens, you can do this. Nothing else really matters right now. This is pure joy. Know that even if you feel that you've failed everybody else in the entire world, you saved the lives of each of these tiny fuzzballs, and watched them grow into beautiful young cats who see you as the source of all love and safety in the world.

You. Yes, you, right now.


Gently displacing kittens, I sat up and put my feet on the floor. Lying in the muddle of the open doorway into the hall was my copy of  the Power of Now by Eckhardt Tolle.


I looked at the kittens, now jumping off of the bed and racing each other to the door. They're known for moving stuff, but it's usually hair-ties and favorite toys, not books. Besides, kittens can't read. Pure coincidence. Coinci-Dance? Synchronicity? Does it matter, if the message is good? Take what works, throw the rest out.

The Power of Now is a favorite book, but maybe I need to remind myself of the book's message; maybe read it again. I can't atone for everything in the past, nor can I possibly anticipate everything in the future. I can not possibly accomplish everything that I would, ideally, want to accomplish, in one day. I can only handle one day, and that's today, one moment at a time. I can handle Now, and, right now, that's going downstairs and making sure these little creatures have everything they need.


I'm the source of all love and safety in the world, remember? I've never failed them. They believe.


This is the power of unconditional love. While I may never completely understand the science behind it, a pile of kittens is one of the best tools in my toolbox for fighting a bad brain. A wise, kind woman told me once, “If God is love, animals are angels.”



Yes, I just repelled the Devil with the power of kittens... The anxiety and self-loathing that pulls us away from the unconditional love in the heart of the universe was sent away because, right here, right now, none of that matters. A stupid idea, if it works, isn't stupid. Holy water? I suppose, from a certain point of view, all life is mostly water. The most sacred holy water is the blood flowing through a beating heart that lives because of you and loves you completely. Purr on, little brothers and sisters. Lick my face every morning for the rest of your life. You're a gift from something greater than myself.

The Lavender Bush

An unseasonably warm afternoon in an unseasonably warm October meant that I had a perfect day for transplanting a few treasured garden plants into containers.  When gardening became much more than a hobby, I felt it was OK to openly admit it's therapy. Non-gardeners may not understand why I feel pride in a lavender bush.  Lavender is slow-growing, and can be fussy, but years of love and care allowed it to grow into the beauty it is today.

It's possible for lavender to survive, and even thrive, in a container, if cared for properly.  I'm the sort of plant geek that views this as a challenge, and the possibility of having a container of lavender growing indoors is too good to pass up.  Indoor container gardens have added cheer to many long winters up here in the Great Lakes, so I'm not a stranger to growing things in flower pots (as well as recycled plastic bottles and yogurt tubs, as needed.)   Urban gardening means making the most of what you have, and I've seen enterprising souls create truly ingenious solutions.

Part of this, though, speaks to a more urgent need:  mobility.  The modern economy has created a class of techno-gypsy, and sometimes you need to pull up stakes, without much warning.  The old tribal dreams of  a family plot of land with an herb garden or an idyllic farmstead become something that must be grasped loosely.  We do not know that "this land" will be our children's children's for ten generations to come.  It's a rare family that could guarantee it for the next five.

Yet, some ancient part of us needs to touch the earth, and to see one season follow the other.  We need to know that there is continuity so that we can have belief that life will continue.  Without that, hope looses plausibility.  We do, in fact, need to "put down roots," if only so that we can be reassured, every spring, that the blossoms will come back.  Thankfully, humanity invented clay pots, so that roots and the life they generate can be carried, moved, protected, and allowed to grow wherever it needs to.  While Mother Nature has a lot of great ideas, I really have to give some credit to human ingenuity.

Were we meant to live with the constant uncertainty of modern life any more than lavender is meant to live in a container?  A better question is can we.  The best answer I can give is, "Some can do it better than others, some break and die, but many have thrived."

200 million years of emotional life can't be denied.

Has anybody noticed it's much easier to paint when you have no desire to go near to a computer? Right now, the outside world is a scary place, and computers are windows (HA!) to the outside world. Like most mammals, I react to panic by withdrawing further into my own social unit.

Paint is comfortable and happy, and my friends know how to avoid my triggers, meaning the things that we already know will set me off. This is great for managing times of stress. Experience has taught that a great thing for times of stress is avoiding, triggers, For example, I already understand that the compulsively following the 24-hour news cycle can lead to the sort of weird, compulsive, anxiety-ridden behavior of an addict, and, frankly, there are people who are paid far more than I am for those migraines.

Knowing that this is not my problem, and understanding that it's OK to step away from the monitor, is a powerful tool for controlling stress. I love all of you. Children of Earth, please work this out. You are above my pay-grade.

The most amazing thing I have learned this week was just how significant emotion is in our thinking process, once we really analyze the brain on the meaty-bits level. The science of the brain is a favorite "geek" of mine, but I understand not everybody shares it, so let me just give a link. This article by Stephen T. Asma has given me a great deal to think about.

The animal/ emotional part of our brains is much bigger, older, and more powerful than we tend to give it credit for. Vastly.

"After you spend time with wild animals in the primal ecosystem where our big brains first grew, you have to chuckle at the reigning view of the mind as a computer" ~Stephen T. Asma 

By giving myself larger blocks of time intentionally away from the computer and the possibility of news and its constant panic, I can reduce stress. By allowing myself a larger block per day to just do what I love and paint, I increase joy. By doing both, I can give myself an immeasurable gift. I'm not sure if I can stay with it, but I am willing to keep an open mind.

Our deepest fear

is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

-Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love: Reflections on a Course in Miracles, (ch. 7. sec. 3)
(Often attributed to Nelson Mandela)

“If you fear nothing, then you are not brave. You are merely too foolish to be afraid.” ― Laurell K. Hamilton (Skin Trade)

I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.”
– Nelson Mandela

So many exciting things are going on, and I'm really happy.  I can't express anything but gratitude to the universe, but, of course, there's always that little kernel of fear:  fear of failure, fear of looking like an idiot.  The truth is, everybody feels that, all the time.  John Wayne famously said, "Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway."

Everybody has that fear. Really, It's OK.  Anybody who has ever gone into a creative field has to wonder if they're going to look like a damned fool.  It's a common adage in the art world that to make art is to stand naked on stage.

“Until you're ready to look foolish, you'll never have the possibility of being great.” 

― Cher

When I found this article by author and inspirational speaker Danielle LaPorte, it really spoke to that inner demon.  

Then again, maybe my inner 6-year-old just needs to understand it's OK to be scared.  

Great writing by Kate Courageous: The Truth about Getting What You Want

I'm sharing this article by Kate Swoboda, (a.k.a. Kate Courageous) because I've read it several times over the last couple of days and it resonates with me more each time.  A wise woman once told me, "In this life, there are phenomenal cosmic 'yes-es' and then there is everything else. Follow those 'yes-es.'"

In my own life, I have seen this in play countless times.  When I have begun an endeavor because I was "expected" to, knowing my heart really wasn't in it, the project was naturally doomed from the start, whether that was a job as a typesetter or having somebody else's dream of a house in the suburbs.  By contrast, if I care deeply about a project, I know it and the world knows it.  The spirit catches fire.

"The truth about getting what you want is that the things that are most significant in our lives will start to enliven us even with the first step. Even the fear will be accompanied by that sense of vitality–a vitality that shows up as intrigue, or a new bad-ass attitude towards facing fear, or curiosity about facing a challenge.

"Vitality is that way. A life does not wait to begin when something is fully formed; life is happening, right here and right now, with every stage of development, and when I look around at the natural world, it seems to me nothing but sheer celebration, from acorn to root to trunk to tree."

“And above all, watch with glittering eyes, the whole world around you,

because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.”
by Roald Dahl

Above: "Satyress." Mixrd media on Bristol. c. Portia St. Luke 2012